So freakin confused right now!

How the hell do people do this? How do people fill up their empty space with someone else when they know that the someone else is not the one but they are just doing what they "should" be doing? How do you last through an entire night without thinking about that person, without remembering their touch and without wondering what could've been? How do you not bore everyone to tears retelling stories of the past over and over again recalling all the recent events and how they have affected you? No one wants to hear about that shit over and over again? Why would they want to? But how can you sit there and laugh and carry on and pretend everything is ok and that you don't miss him, or think about him, or wish that when you are sleeping in the bed that he once shared, that he was their again?

I just went out with a huge bunch of people and I had such a great time. But somehow he was always in the back of my mind. And Shopboy has been texting constantly. He wants to catch up again. Ergh I can't do this! I'm just not ready! I miss my ex.